The phantom crown for real?

Oh… ohhh… it must be payback for dissing royalty.  OK, so she’s a blond, and this isn’t the first time she’s been tied to a short, rich, dark-skinned guy with a mustache, but this may be a real deal:  a Queen for Mexico not selected by a Bolivian beauty pagent.

Queen Noor of Jordan, the U.S. born, 57-year-old widow of the late King Hussein of Jordan, is reportedly dating H.M. Carlos Slim, King of Telmex, Prince of Sanborn’s and Count of the many-many dollars.

According to Spain’s Semana magazine, the two are an item and have been seen globe-trotting in super luxurious planes and automobiles.

In a lot of ways, its a perfectly normal match. Both Queen Noor and Carlos Slim outlived their previous spouse, both are descended from Arab immigrant families that did well in the Americas (Queen Noor, nee Lisa Halaby is the daughter of Najeeb Halaby, the son of a Syrian immigrant who started out selling rugs and ended up a Texas oil man. Najeeb, who served as head of the Federal Aviation Administration during the Kennedy and Johnson administrations, was later chairman of Pan American Airways).

Queen Noor will be a godsend to the silly twits who are fixated on Crown Princess Leticia of Spain — who spent some time in Guadalajara as a rock band promoter before helping branch out the Bourbon family tree.  At the very least, it means the snob-appeal glossies will have a second crowned head to grace their cover every other month.

True,  there is still an heir to the self-appointed Emperor, Augustin Irturbide and the imposed emperor Maximiliano.  The same guy.  Irtubide’s  grandson, was kidnapped by the imposed emperor and his loony wife, Carlota…  and “adopted”  on the premise that the Mexicans would accept a Mexican heir to the Hapsburgs.  Um… there was a slight problem.  The youngster’s mother was a United States citizen, and no part of the adoption scheme (the kid’s aunt had sold the kid, then aunty was kidnapped by the Hapsburg’s agents and hustled out of Mexico).  Mom complained, the press had a field day with the story of decadent Euro-trash kidnapping American kids and things didn’t turn out so well for Max or Carlota.

The kid – Augustin Irtubide Green – later taught Romance Languages at Georgetown and died childless, the “phantom crown” of Mexico passed off to various distant relations, now resting on the head of Maximilian Gustav Richard Albrecht Augustin von Götzen-Irtubide (I wonder if he includes all that on his business cards?).  Maximilian Gustav etc. is an Australian businessman, who seems uninterested in the thing, or of being interviewed by the Mexican glossies.

There is also Elena Pontiaskawa… who IS royalty, but making her an unworthy object of the slavering attentions of  high society rags, a leftist intellectual.  Besides, being the head of the Polish royal family, and heir to a throne that hasn’t existed since the 18th century won’t get you much.  That and 14 pesos will buy you a cup of coffee at Sanborns.  And help keep Queen Noor, if she becomes the new matriarch of the Telmex von Sandborn und Carso clan in the style to which she is accustomed.