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So gay!

24 June 2009

Maybe because there were Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender Pride parades across Latin America (and the rest of the world) last weekend, there are a few gay-related themes to Latin American news now.

In Bolivia, where the weird assasination plot against Evo Morales was thwarted, it’s becoming clearer and clearer that the hitmen hired were neo-Nazis formerly employed by the Irish private security firm that guards Shell Oil facilities in that northern European republic.  What makes it sooo gay is that Shell. Irish hitmen wannabes, Bolivian separatists, and wandering Hungarian Nazis all ended up working for Eduardo Rosza Flores a gay Muslim ultra-rightwing Marxist Croation terrorist.

Father Alberto Cutié, who left the Roman Catholic priesthood (and his lucrative TV show) after photos appeared in TVNotas of the priest making nookie with a woman he has since married in a civil ceremony, is now said to be gay, gay, gay.  According to José Linares, Cutié is covering up his relationship with Leonardo (no last name)… lots of salacious details about Padre Alberto caught with his pants down follow. As does the intriguing tidbit that Linares is a FORMER producer from the Catholic Church network, PAX-TV, who was fired from Cutié’s program.

Linares claims the paparrazi photos of Cutié and his now-wife (as well as the marriage itself) are a clever ruse to throw the media off-track, sound a little dubious, but there are some intriguing details that give the story some plausibility: Cutié was a Catholic priest (and whoever heard of a handsome priest?)  and Ricky Martin is one of his neighbors.

And… Hello, Buenos Aires!  South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford, mentioned as a possible Republican Party presidential candidate in 2012, disappeared last week… allegedly heading for the Appalachan Trail.  Sanford’s disappearance led to all kinds of speculation, and questions about his ability to govern, but he has reappeared… on a flight from Argentina. While the Governor is planning to hold a press conference later today, there are all kinds of rumors about what the Governor was doing in Argentina, and why he was traveling alone, without his wife or staff aware of his whereabouts.

Seeing that the Governor is a conservative white Republican, naturally, the rumors involve Latin …. uh.. “male bonding”.   On the other hand, South Carolina is famous for people who can’t read maps, and maybe the Governor just mistook Argentina for Appalachia…

Perverse, I know, but I watched the Gov’s live press conference.  After several minutes meandering through a discussion of his student travel days, tearing up talking about his father-in-law and dragging Jesus into the whole thing, he fessed up he was having an affair with a “person” in Argentina.  He did use the pronoun “her” once, which probably does mean female.  Why are U.S. political scandals so boring?

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