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Eyes wide open

18 August 2013
DIPUTADA

We’re a modern country… with state legislators as stupid as anyone else’s.

While the competition for stupidest state legislator of the year is usually a close race between representatives from Texas, Oklahoma, Arizona and Florida… perhaps this year, the competition can be open to the other NAFTA countries… in which case, PAN deputy Ana María Jiménez Ortiz, in the Puebla State legislature could be a strong contender.

Based on her own “scientific” research Ms.  Jiménez has concluding that only people who can possibly marry each other are those who look at each other while having sex.

La diputada explicó que el impedimento para que los gays se miren a los ojos es la permanente posición del doggie style, la cual, “por más esfuerzos que realice el homosexual pasivo para tener contacto sexual con su pareja, le causará tortícolis, y encima ¡quién pretende amar dignamente usando la posición favorita de los perros”.

The deputy explained that the impediment to gays looking into the eyes of their partner is they always do it doggie style, which means “any further efforts by the passive partner to have sexual contact with their significant other causes torticolis [wry-neck], and … besides, how can they claim their love is dignified, when they’re using a dog’s favorite position?”

Uh…. well, I suppose someone could explain something about anatomy to Deputy Jiménez … and why so many gay guys have great abs from … ahem… thrusting their legs upwards [I’d provide NSFW links, but one can do their own research easily enough]-  And while the Deputy is free to think all gay guys are twisted, that stereotype usually refers to their sense of humor, not their necks.

And, one wonders is she really means that blind people, near-sighted people, and people who do it in the dark, can’t get married, or if she plans to check that when you have sex in the state of Puebla, you don’t just don’t just  lay back, close your eyes and think of Mexico.

Oh… and this is the favorite position of every dog I’ve ever known:

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One Comment leave one →
  1. 24 August 2013 9:01 am

    This woman obviously lacks even a shred of imagination. I’d imagine she fits right into the average legislature.

    It’d be a funny story if she weren’t serious.

    Kim G
    Boston, MA
    Where we wonder exactly how she managed said “research.”

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