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Wajamean, I gotta be fixin’ to speak English?

19 June 2007

Susan De Quensey, the sharpest knife in the drawer down in Fort Bend County, hasn’t let a little thing like the decline and fall of Tom DeLay stop her from jabbing the idjuts that infest Texas:

Okay, so there’s 2,200 people in Oak Point, Texas, who can’t hardly even speak proper English, but are of a mind to pester everybody else about their language ….

A divided City Council has passed a resolution making English the official language of this North Texas town.

The resolution prohibits the council from passing policies or ordinances limiting the role of English as a common language in the city, which has about 2,200 people and is located 30 miles northwest of Dallas.

But that ain’t all. No, sireee. There’s a reason they did this thing.

“I’ve heard from quite a few neighbors from the positive side,” council member Mark Rakestraw said. “They don’t want another dime of their tax money spent on” translating government documents into Spanish, he said.

Well, I tell you what, Mr. Rakestraw, when all the Mexican, Cajun, Czech, and Vietnamese restaurants in town quit translating their menus, your butt is going to starve to death. Two can play this game.
The good news is that “the measure was opposed by most of the people who turned out at Monday’s council meeting,” and anybody with a good sense of humor will start checking Mr. Rakestraw for proper English grammar.

“People who come here should be learning English,” resident Mary Armstrong said. “Here” is Oak Point, a very tiny suburb of Dallas, a section of Baja Oklahoma that somehow got attached to Tejas and has since been overrun by reconquistadors from Michigan . The Dallas Morning News quotes former Oak Point mayor Dave Klewicki as saying “People with the best intentions may be considering this, but it always attracts people who don’t have the best intentions.”

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